Mommy Freak Outs-The Best Job Ever

I love my job. I always knew that when I became a mother, I would be dedicated to that full time. I wouldn't let someone else raise my child for me and see my child reach milestones in their life. So now I'm doing it, and it's the best job ever.

About my last job, you would not believe the horrible things I had to do while I was there. I wasn't so much an office assistant as I was personal slave. But the thing that really bothers me is that my co-workers can't just let someone leave and have a happy life. They can't just let someone leave and be happy: Others' happiness infuriates them. They have to make up lies about that person and repeat those lies to anyone who will listen. They do this so they can blame that person for the horrible work environment. If it's someone else's fault, then they don't have to change anything.

Did you know my office has had 9 assistants work there in the bast 3.5 years? Does that sound like a good place to work? Does that sound like somewhere you would like to work? Does that sound like it's my fault? And yet it is. So I got out, I left. And then the moment you leave, the lies about you start. Like Lynn. The moment she left she IMMEDIATELY became "incompetent" and "idiotic." Make no mention of the fact that just months ago, she was praised as being "brilliant" and "smart as a whip."

Lynn is one of the smartest people to have come through the doors of Summit. As soon as the office heard that she was a Hinckley Scholar and had scored nearly a perfect score on the LSAT, the comments stopped. Oh, except for one. There was one "sour grapes" comment where *someone* said, "Oh, she wouldn't have made a good lawyer, she has no personality." This comment was based on the fact that Lynn wouldn't fawn over Jean as she walked in the door. Funny thing about the assistants: They all hate working there. Why would they rejoice when someone who made their life hell walked through the door?

Also, the funny thing about my old job, they can't see that they are the problem. The MUST blame others. It's a power/control issue. Someone must always be blamed. (I'm actually really used to this: It's just like my father. Nothing is his fault and he will tell everyone that same story.) But when it comes to my job, someone else must always be blamed. I've heard that I'm the one being blamed for both Lynn and Karley leaving. Wanna know something funny? I still talk to both of those girls frequently. Lynn and I are GREAT friends. Dinner friends, Airport friends, Pedicure friends. (We will still get one, I promise Lynn. Especially now that my feet are no longer sausages)

So Lynn and I hang out all the time, but you still think that I'm the reason she left? I happen to know that she sent an email to the people in the office stating VERY CLEARLY that THEY are the problem, and that the only reason she STAYED so long was because of me. Every time I hear that they are still spreading around that lie, I want to call them up and tell them where they can go.

The funny thing is that even if I brought Lynn and Karley into the office and they looked everyone in the eye and told them the truth, they still would blame me. I mean, that's essentially what Lynn did months ago, and they are still spreading around the lie that I was the cause. Someone besides themselves MUST be blamed. So even when totally confronted with the truth, they will believe the lie. It's easier to believe a lie than to make changes in your own life.

But I'll just let them keep spreading it. I don't have to see them ever again!! I don't have to pick up their velvet pants at Nordstrom or make personal phone calls for them, or fix their Internet ever again. I don't have to call the copy machine guy for them because they're too lazy to do it themselves, or refill their paper in their printer, or rearrange the furniture in their office, or CLEAN their office, or buy appliances for their homes. I don't have to listen to the lies they tell each other and keep my mouth shut because I need a paycheck. I don't have to do any of that!! I'm officially done. And I'm in heaven.

All I can do is pray for Jamie while she works there, and hope that she can be strong. That job will destroy your soul, and then blame you for it when it happens. They will keep going through assistants at the same rate until they learn to treat them with respect. But we all know that won't happen any time soon. Assistants are disposable, and are treated as such. It's ok, I'm sure it's somehow my fault.

Anyway, I would like to officially state that I LOVE my current job. LOVE LOVE LOVE it. I can't wait till my little Monkey smiles at me, but until then, I love her big dark eyes. Marcelo and I have a bet on what color her eyes will eventually be. I think they will be the color of Judd's eyes: a light honey brown. Marcelo thinks that they will be more hazel/green. It's very possible. My eyes change color based on what I'm wearing, and so hers could be the same. It's very exciting! It's almost as exciting as waiting to find out if we are having a boy or a girl.

So, I know I've said it a million times, but I really can't complain about this whole baby thing. I get plenty of sleep, and my baby isn't colicy and I don't have to work for a horrible boss anymore. I mean, I'm living the dream right? Well, with 18 hours to do nothing but stare at your baby, you'll tend to start seeing things that will freak you out.

I've already talked about the cord. Well, it's almost 100% healed over. There's just a tiny little spot that's still "gummy" and I'm sure it'll be all healed over in a few days. I think I was over-freaking when it came to the cord and the smell I thought was there. I'm pretty sure I imagined the smell, but I'm pretty sure there more blood than normal. But the band aids really helped and now it's all better!!

Another something that freaked me out was the fact that her bottom eye lids are turn in. I'm afraid of her closing her eyes and scratching her corneas with her lashes. And then there is the vomiting. She's started spitting up A LOT and one time she heaved up everything in 4 giant waves of vomit. It's funny, because she ALWAYS will spit up when I'm changing a (poopy) diaper. So I can't drop her legs or I'll get poop everywhere, but there is spit up pouring down her face, or sometimes down my side. (I'll change her on top of my Boppy often). It's very delightful.

Anyway, I just wanted to take some time to say I have a great life and I love my job. And if anyone needs me to call and set up their iPhone or Blackberry, I'm sorry. I'm busy with my beautiful baby.