All About Evi

Reagan did this earlier. I was fighting against trying to follow the crowd, but as I started to type and update email about my Evelyn, I naturally just had 4 things to say about different things. I guess I can't fight it.

So here are some of the things wrapping up her life, in her own words, of course.

4 of my Favorite Foods:
1. Breast milk
2. Breast milk
3. Breast milk
4. Breast milk

4 Things I Recognize
1. Mommy's voice & Daddy's Face
2. Raya
3. When mommy's eating, because then it's officially time to scream
4. The sound of running water. It calms me down immediately

4 Things I can do
1. Roll over
2. "Talk" and coo. I especially like to "sing along" with hymns
3. Reach for something in front of me.
4. While on my belly, I can pull my legs up under me and scoot forward to get something that's in front of me.

4 Things I Like to do
1. Grab my feet
2. Suck my two fingers on my right hand. Sometimes I even gag myself!! Yummy.
3. Play in my Exersaucer and then shriek when I'm done so mom will come pick me up
4. Grab Raya when she comes close enough to me and laugh heartily at her when she plays with her rope tug

4 Things I do that make mom want to go crazy
1. Refuse to burp and then wake up 20 min later screaming
2. Get frustrated in my stroller and make mom CARRY me and push the stroller at the same time.
3. Refuse to poop until mom puts a brand new clean diaper on me.
4. Pulling mom's hair.

4 Things I look forward to.
1. Bath time!!!
2. Taking a walk in my stroller
3. Being held by anyone.
4. Snuggling with mom in bed during nap time

Goodreads

I've just joined Goodreads! If you are on that site please tell me how to add you as a friend, or please add me as your friend.

Make me a believer of the website!!!

I'm working on a blog about my weekend. It's juicy!!

More to come

MaxKyle?

Someone asked about "MaxKyle" and I thought I should explain because you will probably be hearing a lot about him.

MaxKyle is from Dallas and his first name is Kyle. His whole family calls him Kyle. But when he came to school here in Provo, he introduced himself as Max, which is his middle name. Why such the difference? I don't know. But that's the way things are going around here.

So I named him MaxKyle. All together. One word. MaxKyle it is. It also helps because we have a nephew named Max. It keeps everything clear, concise and understandable.

And who is MaxKyle? He's Julie's man. He drives a bullet bike. He works at FedEx. He goes to school and he's CRAZY about Jules. And she's pretty nuts over him. How nuts? Well she was in Thailand and was supposed to stay until March. Then March got moved to Christmas. And then October because maybe MaxKyle could come and visit her. But that fell through. And so she came home Tuesday. As in 2 days ago.

Fishy, isn't it? Well, it gets better. You see, she made us drop her off at his house before we took her home so she could bathe. She hadn't taken a shower for 4 days, she hadn't slept for more than 2 hours in a row over the last 3 days, and she was still wearing the same pair of undies. But even in this state she wanted to see him.

BUT HEAR THIS!! YOU MAY NOT TALK ABOUT MARRIAGE WITH JULES! DON'T HINT AT IT, DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT!! ARE YOU THINKING ABOUT IT? STOP IT!!

It's so funny because they are so crazy about each other, but they don't want anyone to assume that they will be married. And I actually agree with that. I mean, they've only known each other for 3 months, so that's a pretty smart move on her part.

Anyway, MaxKyle is a staple around here. He was at Jake's wedding and he will be coming in the crazy caravan with us to Colorado. He came to my Birthday lunch today, and he's over at our house every day after work. It's a good thing we like him.

Wedding Bells

I know that everyone is wondering about this, because I made reference to it in my last blog. Yes, Jacob is Married. (Actually, that's ALL anyone commented about in my last blog. WTW?) I'll answer all of your questions. I know what you are asking because we've heard it for several weeks now:

Q: Wow!! Isn't he really young?
A: Yes, he is. He just turned 19 in April. She's 21, maybe 22 already. He's only done one semester of school and really doesn't have too many life experiences. But they want to be married and no one can stop them.

Q: Didn't that happen really fast?
A: Yes, They've only known each other since January and maybe even February. They've only been talking marriage since the 3rd week in August. Actually, back around the 24th of July, he and Clarin BOTH said that they were thinking about going on a mission at the same time and then coming back and maybe hooking up after the mission.

Q: So what happened?
A: No one knows. Were they really thinking about going, but then something "happened?" Or were they just telling us a line about the mission so we would be happy? No one knows what really happened But all of a sudden they told us they were getting married on October 14th. We all thought "Holy Crap!! That's soon!"

But it was to get worse. Two days later they came over for dinner and they said, "Oh yeah, we are going to get married in 3 weeks. On the 13th of September." Uh, what? Why so soon? Well, apparently they wanted to have it that weekend because her brother was going to get military leave and they wanted him to be there. So that's why they moved up the date.

Q: So the brother was there, right? He came to the wedding
A: No. I think they were lying about that.

Q: Why would they lie about that?
A: I don't know. No one knows. Everyone thinks that there was "ANOTHER" reason that they needed to get married, and move up the wedding a whole month. And the brother thing was a believable lie at the time. But no one is saying anything, and no one is asking. I guess we'll know if that's really the case in a few months, right? No reason asking about it now when we'll know about it soon enough.

Q: So you were able to go to the wedding, right?
A: No. I bought my ticket to Eureka the 7th of August. And he didn't announce his wedding for another 2 weeks (around the 20th of August). And he HAD to have the wedding on the 14th of September, the day before I got home. Why did he have to have it that day? Because the brother was coming home, remember? But then we know he lied about that. So basically no one knows why they "HAD" to have it that day, but it meant that no one was there.

Q: Is Jacob happy?
A: He really is! I don't think he knows what he's gotten into, but I think that right now he's happy. She's very mothering to him. She calms him down, and I think she's really a good influence on him. They've been through a lot together, and I think they will be good for each other. I think they need to get things together and go to the temple too, but they have a year to get their stuff together.

Q: So will there be a party? With Cake?
A: YES!! There will be two. One in Colorado in 2 weeks, and one in Eureka around Oct 11th or so. My mom and I went to pick out a cake for the Eureka reception cause we needed to order it quickly. (They didn't' really care what it looked like or anything. They're just showing up). We got to taste many different kinds of cake. They were awesome. Anyway, back to the reception in Colorado. My mom has talked ALL the kids into coming for the reception. Jeff and family from Missouri, and Sarah from Texas. And all the people that are in Utah? My mom is renting a 15 passenger van to haul us out there. Here's a list of the passengers: Mom, Me Marcelo, Evi, Nate, Denisse, Jules, MaxKyle, Jake, Clarin AND Clarin's brother. Yes, a random stranger will be in the car with us. It's going to be a party on wheels. Don't you wish you could be there?

Q: Ahhh, is that why you had to work at your mom's place?
A: Yes. Jake said he wanted the Eureka reception at her place. My mom's house isn't in the best condition. It's a home that was built for a great life in the 1930's and really hasn't been renovated too much since that day. It smells like wet wood, and the kitchen is SUPER MENOS EFFICAZ. If it were me, I would have it at the chapel, or at the local bar down the street. But that's what he wanted. Anyway, While I was there I cleaned out cabinets, painted, cleaned windows, laid sod and moved furniture. It was not my kind of vacation. I was kinda glad to be gone. And that makes me sad to say.

Q: So we know that you weren't at the wedding, who was there?
A: Not too many people. My mom, Nate & Denisse, Marcelo. Some of her family, a few friends. There were less then 20 (Including the bride, groom and the bishop that married them) MaxKyle went to the wedding!!! He's my sister's boyfriend, but my sister wasn't there. She was in Thailand!! So MaxKyle got to there, but not me. Great.

Q: So, I didn't see your dad on the list there. Was he at the wedding?
A: No. He wouldn't go because my mom was there. It pissed off Jake and Clarin and they wanted him to be there. They told him that he should just come and peek in and be there for the wedding and my mom didn't have to see him and he didn't have to see her. But he said no. And then he said, "Why does your mom have to go to everything?" Uh dad? Are you serious? Has she missed any big even in the lives of her kids? You haven't even seen your most recent granddaughter! Don't get mad at her for wanting to support her kids.

Q: Will your dad be at the reception?
A: Uh, a-no. Again, my mother will be there. Too bad for him, like I said before, it's going to be a raging kegger. Without the keg. Replace the keg with cake. It will be a raging caker. I'm so excited. The only thin that will kill my cake buzz is if it's chocolate. ATTENTION ALL THOSE WISHING TO GET MARRIED. THERE IS NOTHING WORSE THEN CHOCOLATE WEDDING CAKE. LEAVE IT ALONE. YOU DON'T WANT IT.

So that's basically it. Ask me any other questions and I'll be happy to answer them for you. Here are some pictures (cuase I know you wanted to see them.)

Don't You. . . Forget About Me

This post title is of course two fold. I feel like it's been so long since I've posted so I'm afraid that you all have forgotten about me. I know I have so many posts to do. I need to do my jam making post and I'm just so far behind. I tried to do it while at my mom's house but she kept putting me to work. See, my brother got married. but more on that later. THIS post is about another matter.

Yes, friends. I went to my high school reunion last weekend. And that is the REAL reason for the title. But you got that, didn't you? I don't know why, but it wasn't as bad as I thought. First there was a Friday night "mixer" that was the opening act to the weekend. It was at a local bar and it was lame. I talked to a few people, said hi, but really it was lame. Alyse and I put in an appearance for about an hour and then we went to Adel's for fries and shakes.

AHHH fries and shakes. Guess what, Eureka-ites? THEY STILL HAVE PINK SUGAR IN THOSE MINIATURE GLASS VASE CONTAINERS! Alyse and I j0ked that it was probably the same sugar as 10 years ago. The fries were just as awesome as ever. So was the ranch dressing into which we dipped them. And the booths are still the same. It just brings back such great memories.

Anyway, the next night was the actual reunion. After I paid my money I got my name tag. Here it is:

To answer your questions: Yes, that was my high school senior picture. The obligatory "hands on the back of the chair, half looking over the shoulder" shot. Gay. Yes, I had bangs back then. Not the cool "sweeping" bangs that you see on all the hip girls today. No, I had the "swiss cake roll" of bangs.

And here is the crazy thing: I HAD CURLY HAIR. BANGS DON'T WORK WITH CURLY HAIR! I didn't know I had curly hair for a very long time. You say, "Alicia, you HAD to have know you had curly hair! I see curly hair in that Senior picture RIGHT THERE. What do you mean you didn't know you had it?"

Well, see I had a sister with VERY curly hair, and I just never thought I had it because it wasn't as curly as hers. But when I finally got to college I realized that I could do my hair in like 4 seconds flat if I styled it curly. (Actually, when I had my hair cut short I would do it in 45 seconds. I would blow it dry and it created these perfect little ringlets. It really pissed Mindy off because I would just walk out of the bathroom and be done. She had to fight hard with her curling iron and still leave unsatisfied.) Anyway, Those are the curls I had.

Anyway, I had curly hair and I would use a curling iron on my bangs every day. But I come from Eureka, where there is an average 1 million inches of rain a year. So by the time I would walk from my car to the school, my bangs had taken on water and had created 3 ringlets in the center of my forehead. The center one looked like a pig's corkscrew tail. It was sad. I finally grew out my bangs my freshman year in college. Why did I keep them so long? Because my mom told me that no bangs made you look weird. I should've known who I was talking to: My mom would perm our hair every year. Actually, she even permed her OWN hair last year. Yeah, my mom isn't one that you should listen to when it comes to hair.

So I have an ugly senior picture. Whatever. At least everyone was in the same state of misery as I was. But the party was a LOT more fun then I thought it would be. The girls that were hoochies in high school were still hoochies 10 years later. I am talking skin tight, boobs hanging out, people thinking they are freaking J-Lo with a plunging neckline (plunging to the navel, of course) and horrible shoes that made them look like a desperate prostitute.

They gave out awards for a few people. Like "most traveled," "Who came the farthest distance" and "who had the most kids." I didn't win anything. But I did learn something about myself: I was really desperate in high school. See, I never dated, not even once. But I sure did like to look at those boys!! And there were some that I remember were really hot in high school, and they were STILL really hot. It made me sad I didn't date them and make out with them when I had the chance.

Some of the guys I wish I had made out with: Alpesh, Joel Correa, Jared Salter, and that one guy that was in our AP History class. What was his name? Ryan? Man, I should've made out with him.

The best part of the evening was Julian Mocine-McQueen being the MC of the night. He was our class president. He was just as funny as in high school, and he even said "hella-good" just like old times. Actually, speaking of old times, they made a video. Instead of talking about "shredding the flame" like before, they are rapping about Frisbee golf. I laughed so hard my cheeks were hurting. I'll post it here for those who didn't make the reunion.

EXTREME WARNING!!! THIS VIDEO HAS EXPLICIT LANGUAGE!! VERY EXPLICIT!! DON'T WATCH THIS IF THE "F" WORD UPSETS YOU. You have been warned

I doubt anyone watched that after my warning. I'll just let you know it was hilarious. And everyone got to see Ryan Dexter's naked butt.

So I need to comment on what Jessica wrote in my comments section. She talked about our graduation party where they lock you in the bowling alley so that you can't drink and drive that night. Oh, remember when I told you in my "Highway 101" post that the Seniors before us wouldn't give us the Christmas Tree Sales? Well, they made so much money that at their party they gave away awesome gifts like TV's and big wads of cash. We had to give lame gifts like buckets of car cleaning supplies. *Thanks again class of '97. But I'm still not sad we kicked your trash in Powder Puff* Anyway, the party was called "Safe and Sober" and I guess it did it's job because no on in my class died that night from drunk driving.

But she is right when she said that everyone gets drunk BEFORE they get locked up in the bowling alley. And they call this little bus that will come and pick you up wherever you are, no questions asked. And I hated that place. It was so lame, and you can only play so many games of pool before you want to just go home and sleep. And I'm not surprised you were the only ones dancing there. Everyone else was too high on shrooms to be able to stand.

Oh, and the the "club" that we went to go to was called "Club West"and it's a shameful secret that I don't like to talk about. Not that we every did anything that was shameful, but I just look back and cringe that THAT'S what we thought was a good time. Coming home, smelling like smoke, and having nasty men trying to grind up on you and you having to dance around in circles to try to keep their hands off of you. See why I don't want to talk about it? Oh, and Sunday night was "Club Triangle" for gay and lesbian partiers. I WOULD talk about that if I had gone to one of them. Yech.

So here is a picture of Alyse and I at the reunion.

Here's to another 10 years. GO LOGGERS!!! CLASS OF '98 4-EV-R

(If anyone wants to know who I talked to and what they are doing, please let me know. Like do you know want to know how Trish Keller and Mark Barsanti are doing? Or Michelle Merideth? Or Sicily Crivello and Mark Benzinger? Just ask me. I'm too tired to post all my conversations here. Oh, and 99% of my readers don't give a crap)

Highway 101

You know those posts where the person writes 99 things about themselves? I can fill out those things in like 12 minutes. I think it's because I'm crazy. Oh, and because I don't mind sharing things about myself. Like I'm not ashamed to admit that I've never been asked out on a date in my whole life. Ever.

I also don't have to think long about the things I put in here. I just throw them out. I don't need to look for the most "impressive" things about myself. I don't get how people are like "I can't think of anything." Unless you are Melanie, who is the most humble person in the world. And then she has her husband go and do it for her. (Her husband is amazing to do that for her, by the way)

If I like this post, I think I'll do "99 things about Reagan & Judd." I can lay out all of our embarrassing stories and make you guys wish you were their best friends too.

Anyway, I decided to do a post about Eureka. 101 Things about Eureka. And why 101? Well, cause. . .

1. Eureka, CA is located on Highway 101

2. There is no way to avoid my town if you travel from San Francisco to Oregon

3. I've lost count of how many movies have been made in my town.

4. Some of the more well known movies that were made here are: Outbreak, The Lost World, and Return of the Jedi.

5. Eureka High School has one of the most unique mascots ever: The Loggers

6. I used to think it was so cool that I had a mascot so different from every other school. Your school had a panther, or a tiger or a moose for a mascot. Super lame and super generic. But we got a super unique LOGGER. chop chop.

7. I also loved my school colors: Red and Green. People always say, "like Christmas" but I say, "No, like a Redwood Tree".

8. Most people think that California stops with San Francisco.

9. When I tell them that I live 5 hours north of S.F. and still 1 hour from the Oregon border, they say, "I didn't think that you could still be in California 5 hours north of San Francisco.

10. I look at these people and try to tell them with my eyes how dumb I think they are. Because if you look on a map, San Fran is so obviously located in the center of the state. Why would you think that that's the top? Dummy

11. The average high temp is 64 degrees

12. The average low is 52

13. The RECORD HIGH for this time of year is 74 degrees.

14. That's the way it is almost every day of the year.

15. You almost always need a sweatshirt, but you almost never need a thick thermal jacket. This is the way it will be year round.

16. It's currently 57 degrees inside my house. I'm not joking when I say that.

17. I love curling up under multiple blankets and watching TV or listening to music or just talking to my family members in our house.You always should have a blanket in Eureka

18. My house almost always smells like damp wood. It can't help it. There is so much moisture in the air.

19. The smells of Eureka make me so nostalgic.

20. Everywhere you go it smells like the ocean, salt, trees, earth and rain and running water.

21. I want to bottle up the smells and sell them as perfume. . .Like that Seinfeld episode.

22. Going to high school in Eureka could be hard if you didn't grow up here. People tend to be cliquey.

23. I moved here when I was 13, just about to start the 8th grade. People were pretty accepting to me, but that's because I played sports and because I had been visiting here since I was born. But not everyone was that lucky.

24. There is a lot of Marijuana in Eureka.

25. My mom just told me today that if you have a "215" card, you are allowed to have THREE POUNDS of pot in your possession. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?? Do you know how much that is? I mean, pot is a plant, and when it dries it weighs almost nothing. Three pounds is enough to fill a small suitcase.

26. I could see the Ocean from the windows of my High School

27. My high school had amazing English program. I mean, the other classes were good too, but the English program was by far the best.

28. I read more classics in H.S. then I think the normal person reads. And the English teachers were always voted the "Most Popular" teachers

29. This doesn't have to do with Eureka, but I want to tell this one story. One thing I didn't read was anything by George Eliot. And when I went to college Mindy would always ask me if I had read "The Mill on the Floss" and I would always ask her if she had read "Catch-22". Anyway, we would always answer no to the other person's question. Anyway, when she would ask if I had read any George Eliot I would ALWAYS answer her "George Eliot? I LOVE HIM!!" To which she would always tell me that George Eliot was a girl. And I would always tell her that I knew that, and I was just kidding. And then she would forget and I would get to pull the same joke on her 3 months later. I think I did this gag at least 3-4 different times. It never got old (in my mind, anyway)

30. Eureka isn't a great sports school. It's decent, but it's not the clear cut leader of the northcoast.

31. You wouldn't know that talking to people around here.

32. Most people are obsessed with sports, especially football. Which reminds me of BYU fans and their crazy devotion.

33. For some reason, the people in Eureka always have really nice cars. They may not have good jobs, but they have great cars.

34. There are several different "burbs" in Eureka. Some of the most notable are Cutten, Henderson Center, Myrtle Town and Old Town. I live in Henderson Center.

35. Eureka is really behind on some things and really ahead on others: it's really behind on technology. We just recently got a national cell company. Until then it was just a local company and you would have to pay for roaming charges if you went 20 miles away from the center of town.

36. However it's really ahead on things like recycling and waste management. I have no idea where to go to recycle things in Utah. But I can name three recycling centers within a few miles of my house in Eureka. And it's been like that for 15 years.

37. All the beaches are cold.

38. The water is cold. You need to wear a wetsuit all the time in it.

39. There is a great white shark that patrols off the beach at moonstone.

40. Surfers try to avoid it.

41. The surfers all are crazy. I think they are smoking 1 pound of their pot before they go out there.

42. The pulp mill off of the North Jetty puts out a smelly gas. It smells like farts sometimes.

43. It's really great to suck in smelly pulp mill farts as you are jogging around outside on the track.

44. Eureka High has an open lunch policy. You can go anywhere for lunch as long as you make it back before the next class starts.

45. All schools in our school district have what is called "snack break." It's a 15 minute break between 2nd and 3rd periods.

46. Kids would use this time to go off campus and smoke, drink or do drugs.

47. Teachers too sometimes

48. Eureka High School has hardwood floors in every room, redwood banisters and a massive auditorium with great acoustics.

49. The exterior of EHS is beautiful and very ornate. See? It makes me happy to drive by it

50. If you were wondering why there are so many "Eureka High" based things on this list, it's because I'm back here for my 1o year class reunion. Just in case you cared.

51. There are actually 2 high schools in Eureka. One is called "Zoe Barnum" and it's an "alternative" H.S. Like you can totally screw off for a couple of years and then go to Zoe (Pronounced "Zoh" not "Zo-ee") and then you can make up 2 years in 1 year. If you do that, you can still graduate with your class.

52. The Zoe Kids are scary. I try to avoid them. Plus, only 20% of them actually go back to regular high school. Most of them just get their GED and start to work for Carl's Jr. right away.

53. Eureka High has a great Powder Puff game every year. Legendary even.

54. The Juniors play the Seniors and it ALWAYS gets nasty. It doesn't matter what happens before that, but on the playing field you are enemies.

55. When I was a Junior, there were lots of athletic people in my class, and we kicked the Seniors ALL OVER the field. They were SOOOOO mad at us.

56. Oh yeah, choosing a mascot for our P.P. team was a nightmare. The administration vetoed all our ideas. We ended up having to go with "Iron Maidens." Which now that I think about it is pretty cool.

57. Boys are the cheerleaders for the game. They dress in drag and usually have their balls hanging out sometime during the evening. Sometimes boys get suspended for their actions/moves on the cheer squad. It's hilarious.

58. So back to #55, The Seniors (who were the class of '97) had this AMAZING money making fundraiser. It was the sale of Christmas trees. They made so much money the 3 years that they did it, that they were able to take the whole class to the water slide park in Redding (3 hours away) for the senior trip. We went to a local park for ours. Anyway, when it was time to give the Christmas tree program to another class they *should've* given it to us because we desperately needed the money. But they were still mad about the powder puff thing and gave it to the sophomores. Bastards.

59. In my house in Eureka, there is a white board to write down messages. My father would routinely take the marker and write on the walls ABOVE the board or to the side of it. It really makes me mad. I've noticed there are still some numbers on the wall here in our house that haven't been cleaned yet.

60. There is a street in Eureka called "Bhuner". It's pronounced "Boone" but I always call it "Boner" to be crass and inappropriate.

61. Berries are everywhere. Not only are there Blackberries, but there are also marion berries, thimble berries, huckleberries. There is a feast all around you.

62. The Loleta Cheese Factory makes the best cheese curds in the world. They also have a big window where you can see the cheese being made. It's just like watching an episode of "Unwrapped" on the Food Network

63. Admission to the Sequoia Zoo in Eureka is Free

64. Up until very recently, the Sequoia Zoo was home to the worlds second oldest Chimpanzee. His name was Bill

65. Bill would throw poo at you through the bars in his cage. If you see his arm raise, he's not waiving hello at you. STAY BACK.

66. Right behind the zoo is a mini-redwood forrest. You can go hiking there, pick berries and just enjoy the smells of the damp earth

67. To get to the full redwood forrest you need to drive either 20 min north or 20 min south of my town. I prefer to go north. Because Trinidad is north and so are most of the good beaches too.

68. I do not like the beach

69. Whenever I go to the beach, I usually end up with sand in my underwear, hair, ears eyes and mouth. It doesn't matter if I just stand there and do nothing. I will get sand in my underwear.

70. Whenever you go to the beach here, you MUST have a bonfire.

71. No one wears a bathing suit at the beach. Instead you cover up with layers and layers of sweatshirts, pants, hats, etc.

72. Fort Humboldt in my town was once visited by Ulysses Grant.

73. Eureka has houses dating back to the mid 1800's

74. The town was founded during a logging boom here on the north coast. That's when my great-great grandparents came.

75. They came from Scandinavian. Johnson is their name. Do you get any more Scandinavian then that?

76. Our current home is the home that my mother grew up in

77. It's much nicer now then when she lived here.

78. This house had only 1 bathroom for over 70 years.

79. Sunday mornings were a nightmare. 7 people all trying to take a shower before 9 am church. I never got to take a shower alone.

80. Eureka is historically protected from most of the politics and influences of California by what we call "The Redwood Curtain"

81. In the winter you can go 45 minutes and get to the snow

82. In the summer you can go 45 min and get to the HOT HOT HEAT.

83. My brother and his wife always forget how cold it is here and always have to buy more sweatshirts for their kids while they are here.

84. I have never had seafood any better then when in Eureka

85. I have gone clamming in the slough, crabbing in the bay and salmon fishing in the ocean. The ocean is full of good stuff ready to be eaten.

86. Eureka has the best dungenous crabs. I don't think I spelled that correctly.

87. Most houses in Eureka have mold in them

88. There are seagulls everywhere in my town.

89. The birds were trained like Pavlov's dog: When the bell would ring to signal 5 minutes to get to class, the birds would start to circle in anticipation of gobbling up all the food the kids had left behind. If you were late getting to glass the birds would dive bomb you and you would probably get pooped on.

90. Los Bagels is the best Mexican based store selling Jewish foods in the world. It has everything: Challahs and pan de muertos. Kinishes and conchas. Bolillos and menorahs. You have to visit it and have some pesto.

91. Los Bagels is closed on Tuesdays. I can't tell you how many times that burned me on my lunch break and I had to scramble to get lunch somewhere else.

92. Eureka has the best Chinese Food ever.

93. Also there is an amazing bakery 2 blocks from my house.

94. don't forget about the great BBQ place. I had ribs for dinner last night. I'm still tasting the sauce on my lips. (It's no wonder I have such a hard time losing weight when I'm here.)

95. At my Jr. High you weren't allowed to walk on the grass

96. My Jr. High didn't have a cafeteria. Just 2 "snack food" windows.

97. I want everyone to come here and pick blackberries with me one day

98. I wish I could've seen and lived here during the late 1800's and early 1900's. I bet it was so beautiful.

99. I was lucky enough to have great friends growing up so I stayed pretty clear of the bad stuff that is so prevalent. I never drank, smoked or snorted anything. I'm sure I'm one of the only ones.

100. Eureka is not a great place to raise kids.

101. But Eureka is a great place to live after your kids are grown.

Mercenaries 2

Have you seen this new ad on TV? Oh my gosh I could watch it all day: (By the way, the "warning" at the beginning is for the video game, not for the song. Just in case you were wary of watching it)

Have you seen this new ad on TV? Oh my gosh I could watch it all day:



My fav is when his voice goes up right at the end of a stanza. "You will do the dance of sorr-ROWW"

This is the full song but you can find the other 30 second commercial version too. I just think the whole song is better.

Please tell me you love this as much as me.

Jesse

Jesse is our family dog. He's a good dog. He's about a million years old. Just kidding. (Sort of) He'll be turning 14 this Christmas. He's still as crazy as the day we got him. For some reason, we get cockers. Our last 2 dogs have been cockers and blond cockers at that. But Jesse is crazier then all of them.

He loves his ball. Tennis balls will do, but he especially loves his Kong. It bounces everywhere when you throw it on the ground. He tweaks out when you throw it and it goes everywhere. The funny thing is that he still pretends he's a puppy. He leaps in the air and twists to get it. But after one jump he has to sit down cause it's just too much work for his old fat body.

But back to the ball: It's super bouncy so it springs back when he bites it. This is what a Kong looks like and what Jesse looks like with his baby:

Here he is waiting for me to throw the ball. And what he looks like when he gets desperate. He howls this really cute way. Adorable.

And here he is just chewing on his ball. He can just lay there for hours and chew on it rhythmically like that. It makes me smile.

However, what is NOT funny is his affection for clothes. Not just any set of clothes. We are talking stinky, smelly, crotch sweaty, armpit stained dirty clothes. THOSE are what he loves and craves. He seeks them out. And if given a chance, he'll pounce on them and eat them. Yes, he will eat right through them. Please see Exhibit "A":

In our haste to get the baby in the bath and then to bed, we made the mistake of leaving this on the couch. He snatched it up very quickly and made short work of it. Honestly, I didn't love the color of this outfit, but I loved everything else about it. It was warm and of the best quality (this is the Laura Ashley outfit, remember?) And look where he ate it. RIGHT where she threw up on it. On the arm where she sucks her hand, and on the collar where she spits up. This outfit went in the trash.

I was so upset and have been so careful to keep the dog out of places where I am. Or to pick up my clothes (And Evi's Clothes) quickly. But I'm not used to it. So sometimes I forget. See Exhibit "B":

UGH! I was so upset with this!! Melanie & Shar gave this to me along with some CRAZY adorable striped pants that match. I was so upset about this because it was my fault!! I knew better!! How could I be so stupid? However, it was just the arms. (He literally was alone for 30 seconds. How could he do this much damage in 30 seconds?) And I talked to my mom and we are going to turn this into a short sleeve shirt and re-use the cuff links. So this one can be saved.


Exhibit "C" I don't have a picture. It's my own garments. The damage is much smaller then the other two. But mostly because he only had 15 seconds this time. It's in the left armpit. I think I'm going to have to throw those away. I promise you there will be no more exhibits. I'm going to be vigilant.


But I do love Jesse. My mom got him in the divorce. She joked that he came with the house. So when she got the house, she got the dog too. I think she loves him as much as we do. It will be sad when he dies. But at the rate he's going, that won't be for a very long time.

Book Review-Lolita

I wish that I were on better terms with the people from my office. Well, not all of them. Mostly just Matt. See, Dan never made any secret about the fact that the assistants were "less" then him. We were there to do his bidding, and he was upset when we didn't jump when he called. I remember one instance where I was doing something for Jean on another office computer because my computer was not working. She had a client there and was shouting things at me to put on an addendum that I was creating.

All of a sudden, Dan walks in with a client and is like "you need to move. I need to write an offer with my client." And I flat out said NO. I said I'm sorry, but no, I'm doing something for Jean and I'll be done in a minute. He was baffled. His client was standing right there. HOW DARE I!? He said to me, "I have a client right here, and I need to write and offer NOW. You need to give me the computer." And I said, "I'm sorry, but Jean is in the other room with a client as well. She is shouting things at me. Can you hear her? I'll be done in just a minute"

Well, he later complained to Jean that I was RUDE to him in front of a client. Jean actually brought it up to me to tell me how I was a bad person. And I told her that I would do it again if given the chance. Because I would rather have Dan mad at me then Jean. Basically, he was upset that I said no to him AND in front of a client. He thought that he would walk in and boss me around and show his client what a big wang he has. He was wrong. I cock blocked him and he was pissed. That's just a little example of how he didn't respect me and how he thought I was there to be bossed around.

So that's how Dan thinks of us assistants. And you all know how Jean feels about assistants: Disposable. Once she gets tired/upset with you over some imagined wrong you have done to her you are on her s*** list and on your way out. But Matt was never like that. Matt was usually very respectful to the assistants. He would thank us for things that we did. He wouldn't assume we were there to serve him. He was pretty nice.

I actually considered him a friend. I should've realized that his ties were much stronger to Jean then to me. Even though she talks about him behind his back and tells people private things about his life, he still feels tied to her. Maybe he doesn't know she does this, but I'm sure he suspects it. I mean, she does it to everyone else, why would he be any different?

Anyway, this little trip down nausea lane was with the point of saying this: I'm sad I'm still not friends with Matt. Matt and I would talk about books all the time. One of his wife's favorite authors was Marquez, who is my favorite author. And for the longest time he kept trying to get me to read Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov. I wanted to read it, but I never got around to it. (And I wasn't going to read it until I finished 100 Years of Solitude). But then at the library I stumbled upon it and decided now was the time to read it.

I SHOULD'VE READ IT YEARS AGO!!!! This book is amazing. Breathtaking even. See Nabokov (as you might have guessed) is Russian. And English is his third language, after Russian and French, but he wrote this book all in English. And it's AMAZING. I can't gush enough about how much I loved this book.

Let me tell you right off, the book is not for casual readers. You must be invested. And you should know what it's about: a pedophile. See the narrator is a man in his late 30's (nearly 40) who falls in love with and has a relationship with a 12 year old girl. Yeah, like I said, it's not for casual readers. H.H. (the narrator calls himself. Short for Humbert Humbert) has always had a thing for little girls. He calls them "nymphets" and he seeks them out. Usually it was just to look at them, dream about them, imagine what they would look like up close. But then he becomes a border at a house where a woman has this daughter. Her name is Dolores. Or Dolly. Or Lo. Or Lolita.

And he's obsessed with her. He dreams about her and spending his life with her and how she would make him so happy. But her mom is always around (GOOD FOR YOU, MOM!!!) and so he can hardly ever talk to her. After a series of strange/tragic/funny/impractical and yet shocking events happen, her mom is out of the picture and they are all alone in the world. That's where it gets bad.

You should know this book is not vulgar in the general sense of the word. There are no graphic words, no horrible language depicting lurid acts. But the acts are there, and the way he alludes to them makes it clear what he's trying to tell you. And then you realize what has just happened, and you are appalled. They are horrible things, but Nabokov just puts it so dang beautifully! Dang him and his genius of prose. Anyway, back to H.H. The fact that he rationalizes his actions and thinks that they have a RELATIONSHIP shows just how delusional he really is.

But this book is BEAUTIFUL. I cannot gush enough about how much I loved it. How much I loved the language, the style, the humor. It really is a funny book. I laughed out loud several times especially at the end. The end is especially funny. But I keep coming back to the language. It's so amazing. And again, knowing that he wrote it in his THIRD language is so crazy. I mean, I don't think half of the writers these days could write a sentence HALF as beautiful as him, and they have lived here all their lives.

I think that this is a great American novel. Which is funny because back in the mid 1950's when it was written one publisher wouldn't publish it because he said it was "anti-American." Uh, are you crazy? Almost 50% of the book talks about the different sites and scenes of the America few people know. It is brilliant in every way.

Let me just give you a little example of the style of Nabokov's writing: "A thunderstorm accompanied me most of the way back to Grimm Road, but when I reached Pavor Manor, the sun was visible again, burning like a man, and the birds screamed in the drenched and steaming trees."

HOLY CRAP!! HOW DO YOU COME UP WITH THAT STUFF??? Just gorgeous. I think everyone needs to read this book. Especially if you love writing, and you want to learn how to be a better writer. This book is the Mecca of writing.

So anyway, I loved this book. Go read it. It's for everyone. As a matter of fact, as I was in the car coming back from our cabin, my mom asked me about it, and I told her the premise. I was about 75 pages from the end, and she wanted to read it with me. We read it out loud all the way home and then she HID it from me so I couldn't find it and read the end without her. Now THAT is dedication to a book. And you know what? My mom is a total prude. If she loved it that much, then I'm sure you will too.

It's just too bad Matt and I can't talk about it.

Eureka

I am currently sitting in the kitchen of my youth, with every part of my body freezing. See, I'm from Eureka, CA and there is only one way to describe the North Coast: COLD. Current Temp outside: 54 degrees. And the high is only expected to go to 62. That is it is every day of the year. It really doesn't get any colder than that, nor does it get any hotter. (It does however get rainier)

Many people know my aversion to the cold. However, for some reason I still love Eureka. I love the smell of Eureka most of all. It smells like the ocean, salt water, wind, fresh bread, fish. I love it so much. I just roll down the window and breathe and breathe and then roll it up quickly so i don't freeze.

I love sleeping with three quilts on my bed and having all that weight on me and waking up all snuggled up. I love steaming cups of hot chocolate, lighting a fire in our den and watching TV with my baby curled up by me. I love going for walks and getting damp in the mist and walking through the Redwood Forrest and jumping around on the springy earth. I really love Eureka.

I do NOT love my mom's house. First off, it's old. It was built in the 1930's, and when all the other houses of that era were getting updated and getting bathrooms upstairs, I had a father who didn't want to do that and so I grew up in a nasty house. 4 bedrooms, ONE bathroom. Sunday morning before church was a joke. Literally a horrible horrible joke where the punchline is that there are 3 people crammed into the shower together all trying to wash their hair without crashing into the person next to them.

Second: There is a funny smell at my mom's house. I think it's all the wood. Wood absorbs smells, and it's hard to get them out. Also, there is lots of moisture here, so it smells like damp, stinky wood almost everywhere. She got rid of the carpets and re-did the hardwood floors. But the slight smell still lingers. I don't know how to get rid of it. I don't know if it can be done.

Third: My mom has a giant house to clean all by herself. She is living alone now, for the most part. Her sister + husband are here lots, and they don't do anything to make the place cleaner. They leave their messes everywhere, and then my mom has to come home from work and decide whether or not she wants to clean them. Basically, if my mom had a fully cleaned house it would never get dirty. She's at work all day, comes home, eats a little food, and then is of to walk the dog. So when others come and leave messes, she won't clean them up. (And why should she? She was working all day and she didn't make the mess) Anyway, because she's almost never here, she really doesn't care what it looks like.

But I do care. I have to be here for the next 2 weeks, so you'd better be sure that I'm going to clean it. (which is what I should be doing now because my baby is still asleep at 9:44 am)

Finally, I have a problem. I forgot to bring warm pants/PJ pants. I'm used to sleeping in my chones. I mean I do have warm fleece PJ's, but I just forgot them back in Utah. So I'm freezing once I get out of bed. I also forgot a SWEATSHIRT!!! I'm not going to be able to last too long without that.

Luckily, I brought plenty of warm stuff for Evi. She's going to be bundled up all the time and I'm so excited to put on this ADORABLE outfit that Melanie got me. But as for me? I'm in trouble. Serious butt freezing trouble. But at least I'm in Eureka!!