The Cabin

Mom is selling the cabin. It's sad, but we knew the good times had to come to an end sometime. We have had that cabin for more than 1o years and we all have some great memories there. My husband has said that it's in the top 5 most favorite places in the world for him. He loves to be outside, relaxing under the trees. It is the embodiment of vacation and it will be missed. Here are some of my favorite things to do while there and the things I will miss most:

* Wakeboarding
* Drinking root beer (and letting my mom have "just a sip" of it herself)
* Falling asleep on a hammock after trying to read a book
* Playing SkipBo with my sisters
* Eating licorice
* Leaving the lid off the licorice tub so it gets hard and super chewy, and then listening to everyone whine about how SOMEONE left the lid off the licorice tub. So then I try to just take out a FEW pieces and leave them to get hard. But they always seem to disappear before I can go retrieve them. So then I just take the lid off the whole tub as retribution.
* Getting sunburned because I always forget to slather at least ONE part of my body and then taking a shower followed by a long nap to let the heat soak in
* Trying to convince my husband to get in the water
* Jogging down to the boat dock and then jumping in the water
* Smores and "skit night" by the campfire
* "Speerneck" stories
* Taco Bombs. And BFTT's. Actually, I don't think I will be missing those.
* One bathroom for 20-30 people
* My Aunt Lynda's crazy CRAZY antics.. And I mean crazy. Whether it's trying to convince people to eat the left over pizza crusts from 3 nights ago, or making clothes out of pillowcases, there is never a dearth of mocking material when she is around.
* Fresh blackberry pies
* Walking/riding down to the "swimming hole"
* A fridge so full of food it cannot close properly or even chill the food adequately.
* And finally, the battle that IS the yearly photo. I mean, we've only been doing this for 10+ years, but for some reason, something always goes wrong. Usually we know EXACTLY when the photo will be the first day of camping. "Hey, don't forget, family photo Thursday at 4:00 pm". But then there is always SOMETHING. Like a couple of kids are down at the swimming hole, or someone decides to leave early so we have to take the photo a day before, or someone forgot to ask a neighbor to take the picture so we scramble to find someone at the last moment. Or my personal favorite, last year, where mom decided to make dinner and then RIGHT BEFORE she announces it's picture time. So the food waits and gets cold for 45 minutes while we try to find a photographer and then proceed to give her 97 cameras to take a picture with each one. It's always something.

So here are some pictures of Trinity Center 2009. The last year we would all have those crazy wild times, even though we didn't know it at the time. (Thanks to my cousin Dakota. I stole them all from her)

The genesis of the FAMILY PHOTO. Notice how everyone is confused, there is someone trying to direct things, babies are crying, people are getting annoyed:













But then we always pull it together at the end:


Farewell cabin! Enjoy the next people who own you. But I'm sure they won't love you as much as we did.

Home

It's so nice coming home from a long trip. Even though we live in a little postage stamp of a home, it's ours. We have our routines here, and they are comfortable. It's nice being able to get back to normal.

Where were we you ask? Well the Bibbers my mother and I went to Missouri for about a week. We dropped off the coveted grandfather clock for my sister Sarah to pick up at a later date, and we got to see my brother's youngest daughter get baptized. We got to go to the lake and eat real Kansas City BBQ and it was just a great time all around. Here are some highlights from the trip:

* Taking off just hours after my baby's 2nd birthday party. (Party will be saved for another post) We wanted to get on the road sooner but there was a big issue with the trailer we were driving and the lights on it not working. Uhaul helped us out, though and we soon got on the road.

* Driving all through the night to get to Missouri Monday morning. There were a few times that the Baby screamed bloody murder because she wanted her mother (who was driving) and she wasn't being properly served. My baby gets HYSTERICAL and will do things to get my attention. She'll rip out her hair, stick her fingers down her throat to make herself gag/wretch/vomit, scratch herself, bang things and kick the DVD player. She knows that ALWAYS gets my attention. The good thing is that by the end of the week long trip, we had been in the car so much and traveling so much that she was used to it. The trip back to Utah had no screaming meltdowns at all!

* Going to the lake and getting up on a wakeboard! That hasn't happened in years. Maybe since I was married. I just gained too much weight, and our boat isn't the best for pulling people up on a wakeboard. But my brother's boat has a great tower on it and it's as easy as pulling yourself up on a ladder. I was so shocked I got up. I went around for a while but I was so tired from the previous day (when I went around on the super tube behind the boat) that I didn't have the strength to go very long. Next time for sure. But I got up! I'm just happy I got that far. Especially because as I strapped on the boots and slid into the water I IMMEDIATELY wanted to be out. That old nervousness of "you aren't going to get up, you will make a fool in front of everyone" was there. And I really didn't want that. I think I said "Oh, I really don't want to do this" but I stuck it out and did it! Hooray for me!

* Texting Lynn while at a BBQ place to ask her the proper protocol of saying "Yes Ma'am" to someone. I feel like I'm being rude when I don't reciprocate a "ma'am". I was told that if the person is older I should always say it, but THEN I got worried that I would offend someone by using ma'am when they were younger than me, and thereby telling them that I thought they were old. Lynn let me know that it doesn't really happen, and that if you are older than them and you still say it, they just look at it as respect. (Did I get that right Lynn?) I still feared doing it because I thought it would sound fake. But now I know the rules.

* Coming back from an outing to the park only to find a WATER MOCCASIN (also known as the COTTONMOUTH) snake chilling in the front yard. Actually, chilling about 3 feet from where my baby was just walking. OHHHHHHHHHHHHH MYYYYYYYYYYYYY CRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP!!!!!! We ran inside, locked the door and my sister in law proceeded to call everyone she could think of until she found a ward member to come over and kill it. Which is a big deal for her because Tina is a big animal advocate. Example? the day before I found a spider on the floor and told my 14 year old niece to take care of it (I don't do spiders, remember?) and they PICKED UP THAT SPIDER AND PUT IT OUTSIDE! ZZHHHHHHGGGGEEEE (audible shiver) But luckily they were smart enough or cautious enough not to take chances with one of the most aggressive and deadly North American snakes that was just chilling out right by the front door to their house. The snake got it's head taken off. And I rejoiced in knowing my child would not die that day.

Just so you know, while Tina was calling trying to find a snake wrangler, I took the broom from the kitchen and unscrewed the handle. I was not going to let that thing get away. So if it started to move, I was prepared to go out there and beat it to death. Seriously, it was FEET away from my child. I was mad, and it deserved to die.

*Going outside to pick Mulberries. They are pretty good, if you can look over the inch worms that you have to pick out (or eat) and the little stems that come off with the berry. You can just spit those out after you eat them. Don't try to take them off the berry, because it squashes the juice out. But going into the back woods of the Missouri wilderness might get you in trouble. Which brings me to. . .

*My mom got a little bit of poison ivy on her face just to the right of her mouth, close to her chin. (I call it the "zit spot" because every month I get one JUST ONE zit right there. At least it's only one, right? But isn't 30 too old to get a zit when I'm PMSing?) Anyway, as we were driving home and were pretty close to the Wyoming border, my mom says, "This poison ivy is really itching my face. But I'm doing good not to touch it. But I have another little itchy thing in my eye lashes. Can you look and see if I have poison ivy in my eye?" And being the inquisitive nice daughter that I was, I agreed. I should've refused. Because as I looked in her eye, I noticed that her lashes were particularly thick in one area. And as she blinked, they moved in response. And then I saw it. . .The tick in my mother's eye.

Now, I want you all to go get a mirror. Or look at a butter knife you have retrieved from the kitchen. But you need to know where this tick was. Take your eyelid, and flip it up as if you were going to do that hideously grotesque and macabre act of flipping your eyelids up on themselves. Don't do it all the way, just gently tilt up your lid until you can see the teeny tiny ridge of skin running JUST UNDER your eyelashes. The minutely small piece of skin between your lashes and your EYE BALL. And you will know where that tick had its nasty Lyme disease-carrying head buried.

My mom says she wishes she could've preserved forever the look on my face when I realized what it was. I was horrified, and couldn't even bring myself to look at it, especially when it moved its legs. Bleeeggch. I'm getting queasy now just thinking about it. We were going to wait till the next gas fill up so my brother could pull it out himself, but after about a 5 second wait I just couldn't think of that thing feasting SO CLOSE TO HER EYEBALL for another second and I said I would just get it.

If anyone knows anything about pulling out a tick, you know that you have to get the whole thing making sure the head doesn't detach. So I grasped that thing, and gave it a gentle pull thinking that was all I would need to do. Nope, it was really drilled in there. So I just pulled harder and success!! And I was pretty sure I got the head too. That thought was confirmed when I looked at the thing and saw 2 chunks of my mom's eye flesh still visible from its nasty little pincers. Mom bled a little, but was very VERY happy to have it out. She said even with the little blood in her eye it was much more comfortable than having it on her itching her. AND SUCKING HER BLOOD I should like to add.

For the rest of the ride home I kept checking my (and my baby's) hair and all over our bodies for the hidden ticks I knew were at that moment giving us Lyme disease. I didn't find any but that's probably because they saw the death of their comrade and ran for their lives.

* And finally, you will ALL think this is gross, but it made me just so happy. When I got into the upstairs shower that all the girls share, I noticed that there was hair on the wall. Isn't that awesome? ALLLLL my sisters put their hair on the wall while they are taking a shower. I don't know where we all learned it. Probably from each other. But it's so nice to know that the same trait is being passed down to my niece. And you should know that her mother (my sister in law) specifically TOLD her daughter to put her hair on the wall. Because after they pulled a hair ball out of the drain that was the size and shape of a large rat, they figured that was the best way to avoid it in the future. Makes sense to me! That's why I do it!

I love my family. It's good being home. I can't wait for the family reunion in July!

Scarred Witless

So I got a call from our second counselor in the Relief Society today. She asked if I could substitute teach in R.S. next week. I of course immediately agreed. Because relief society lessons in our ward are usually really bad (since the bishop's wife got released. She gave the best lessons) and the teachers have a hard time reigning in the horrible comments. Seriously, there was a comment about a serial rapist the other day. So beyond the scope of the lesson on the word of wisdom!!!

So I find myself rolling my eyes a lot and thinking I could do better.

Then she says, "so the lesson is #12. . . .The Atonement"

Gulp. Gasp. Choke. Vomit a little in mouth, quickly swallow it and say, "Ohh! Great!"

Someone is being served up a hefty HEFTY slice of humble pie. With ice cream. You know, "a la mode" style. And then a big portion of humble cobbler, also with ice cream. And humble brownies with mint frosting on top. I'm going to eat some serious humble calories next week.

Stupid, stupid girl.

P.S. I have birthday pictures and travel log to post. But as you might suspect, my mind is a little scattered as of 6 pm this afternoon. Stupid girl, indeed.

Make Way For The Birthday Boy!!

Marcelo turned 30 on Saturday. Last year we weren't together for his birthday and that was sad. But this year I remembered 5 days before the big day that not only was it his birthday, but he would be turning 30! Something had to be done, and quickly.

And I decided to go SUPER ambitious and try for a surprise party. I don't know what I was thinking. Marcelo can sniff out a surprise or a secret better than any CIA agent. And once he suspects, there is no going back. He ferrets out the secret and then it is a secret no longer. But he didn't suspect a thing!

I don't know if it's because I planned it at the lat moment. Or because I only invited a very few people. But it was so great. He was 100% surprised and had a great time. For food we had:

Chips and Salsa
BBQ beef
BBQ chicken legs
Carmel corn
Rice

And for dessert we had brownies and ice cream. Instead of a cake I made him a pan of cinnamon rolls because he prefers those. Here are just a FEW pictures. I was really busy barbecuing and making sure that everything was perfect that I didn't really get to take any pictures.

These are the guys that helped me distract Marcelo. Cris kept him working for most of the day so he stayed away, and Juan Carlos made fake plans with him in the afternoon so he would for sure come home on time.















Here are some of the kids having a great time.




























And here he is blowing out his birthday candles. With a little help from the Bibi. Notice how her cheeks are all puffed out ready for blowing? Perfect.

And then we ate and had a great time. We danced a little salsa, ate lots of food and thoroughly hated ourselves the next day. Well, maybe that's just me!

Happy Birthday Amorcito.

30 Before 30

I just found these two lists online. And seeing is how I am turning 30 this year, I thought they were insightful. Except for the alcohol parts. But anyway, here they are. (I found these lists at thefrisky.com in case you were wondering)

30 Skills Every Woman Should Have Before Turning 30:
1. Hard-boil an egg
2. Diplomatically tell Mom to butt out
3. Ace a job interview
4. Ask a man out
5. Send a thoughtful thank-you note
6. Listen to a friend in need
7. Ask for help
8. Effectively end an unhealthy relationship (romantic or platonic in nature)
9. Beautifully wrap a gift
10. Say “no” gracefully
11. Whip up a great dinner with the five items in her fridge
12. Forget pleasing him, by 30 a woman should be able to tell her man exactly how to please her
13. Sew a button
14. Mix a kick-ass cocktail
15. Take off her bra without removing her shirt
16. Apply lip gloss in the dark
17. Balance her checkbook
18. Create a budget
19. Find the best deal
20. Negotiate a salary and/or pay raise
21. Read a map
22. Hail a cab
23. Say something in French just for the hell of it
24. Apologize when she’s wrong
25. Dress for her body type
26. Change a flat (or know whom to call to come change it)
27. Spot a fake (handbag, diamond, potential friend …)
28. Feign interest
29. Know what to tip on a $25 dinner bill
30. Hold a baby (Hey, someone you know is bound to have one sooner or later.)


30 Things Every Woman Should Quit Doing By 30

1. Buying clothes from the junior section.
2. Forgetting her parents’ birthdays.
3. Making out with her BFFs at bars for attention.
4. Making out with her boyfriend at bars for attention.
5. Filling her bed with stuffed animals (really, even one is too many).
6. Carrying a torch for anyone she hasn’t seen in the last five years.
7. Rebelling against her parents for the sake of rebelling against her parents.
8. Declaring an entire gender “all jerks.”
9. Holding a grudge against anyone who wronged her in high school.
10. Skipping regular gyno exams.
11. Going to bed without washing and moisturizing her face.
12. Being “that person” who had a bit too much to drink at the office party.
13. Crushing on Justin Bieber.
14. Thinking she’s got it all figured out.
15. Calling her father “daddy.”
16. Engaging in sibling rivalry.
17. Trying to get by on her looks.
18. Living paycheck to paycheck.
19. Expecting a man/knight in shining armor to swoop in and save her.
20. Aimlessly jumping from job to job.
21. Using MySpace to pick up guys.
22. Expecting a man to do all the wooing.
23. Wishing she had someone else’s life.
24. Expecting everyone to drop everything because it’s her birthday ...
25. ... or because her “boyfriend” of two weeks dumped her.
26. Measuring her self-worth by a number on the scale.
27. Being cheap.
28. Quitting a job without having a new one lined up first (especially in this economy!).
29. Blaming her mother for all her issues.
30. Romanticizing her 20s.

So what do you think of the lists? What would you add? What would you take away? i.e. what do you think it's still ok to do after 30? Or what skill is stupid no matter what your age? For my part boiling an egg is almost useless to me because the smell of hard boiled eggs makes me want to gag.

And I know I have things I need to quit doing before I'm 30. Like watching too much Reality TV. And the going to bed without washing my face? I'm SOOOO that person.

So please give me your input. I'm dying to know! I have a little over 4 months to rid myself of it!

GO GO GO!!

Make checks payable to me

So when I get done working out, I hate how sweat drips down my head and down the back of my neck. It creeps me out. Neck issues, remember.

Side note: I have just come to realize I have another "body issue" part. That is the back of my upper arms. You know what I'm talking about. That sensitive skin on the back of your upper arms just close to your armpit. The part that wobbles when you wave? The "chicken wing" part? Ohh yeah, now you know. I DETEST anything touching me there. If a shirt hits me at just that spot I have to get rid of it. And the fastest way my child can drive me crazy is by coming up to me and trying to get me to stand up and follow her by touching that part of my body. There was a time when she would touch it about 20 times every day. I wasn't a very good mother because I had to walk myself away from her to get over the creepies when she would do that.

But back to my first neurosis: Things touching my neck. So the sweat drips down and it gives me the heebie jeebies. But I had a brilliant idea. Yesterday after my workout, I grabbed a long length of paper towel and then put it around my head "mammy" style. (Does the fact that I'm white and I described a head wrapping as "mammy style" make me a racist? I just wanted you all to have an accurate mental picture. But I swear I'm not a racist. You believe me, right?)

I put it under the back of my head and tied it up on top of my forehead at the hairline. It worked awesomely! It collected all the sweat, nothing dripped down my back and the heebie jeebies were gotten by none! Seriously, someone needs to start paying me for my ideas. Make checks payable to "Alicia, the genius".

Oh wait, now that I think about it I guess what I just described was a disposable headband. A headband made from cutting down trees. Instead of the poly-cotton things that athletes have been wearing for ages and made super popular in the 80's by a certain Senor MacEnroe.

























Hmmm. Maybe have to rethinking this genius idea. But you can still pay me if you would like. I would not turn down a few $ coming from anyone!

Sure your child is great, but can they. . .

I know all of you think you have the greatest child in the world. You think they are the smartest or the most clever. You think they are the cutest and that when they learn to sing songs they hear they are going to be the next Beethoven.

I mean, we all have bragging rights. My kid walked at 8 months. Your child probably could put together whole sentences with complex prepositional phrases at 13 months. (oh, on a side note my child now says "si" every once in a while. Actually, it's not really "si". She says "gee" or "dee". But it's something!!! The funny thing is that she can TOTALLY make the "sssss" sound. We ask her " what does a snake say" and she does a little lispy "sth sth sth" sound. Adorable. But she won't put it with the "eeee" sound. Strange. Back to topic) And some of you boast a child that taught themselves how to play the piano or read at age 2.

I say this is all well and fine. But I trump you ALL. Case closed, pack it in, this show is over.

My child can fart on command.

She does it to make me laugh. Whenever we hear her fart we say "gasiosa"! and she knows what it is. And so she makes herself fart just to hear us say gasiosa and laugh. She usually does it in the bath or just getting out of the bath. And one of these days she's going to strain herself too hard and poop in my arms. I just know it.

But until then I'm not going to stop her. Because seriously? A child that can fart on demand before her 2nd birthday? This kid has "going places" written all over her. Just you wait.