Sure your child is great, but can they. . .

I know all of you think you have the greatest child in the world. You think they are the smartest or the most clever. You think they are the cutest and that when they learn to sing songs they hear they are going to be the next Beethoven.

I mean, we all have bragging rights. My kid walked at 8 months. Your child probably could put together whole sentences with complex prepositional phrases at 13 months. (oh, on a side note my child now says "si" every once in a while. Actually, it's not really "si". She says "gee" or "dee". But it's something!!! The funny thing is that she can TOTALLY make the "sssss" sound. We ask her " what does a snake say" and she does a little lispy "sth sth sth" sound. Adorable. But she won't put it with the "eeee" sound. Strange. Back to topic) And some of you boast a child that taught themselves how to play the piano or read at age 2.

I say this is all well and fine. But I trump you ALL. Case closed, pack it in, this show is over.

My child can fart on command.

She does it to make me laugh. Whenever we hear her fart we say "gasiosa"! and she knows what it is. And so she makes herself fart just to hear us say gasiosa and laugh. She usually does it in the bath or just getting out of the bath. And one of these days she's going to strain herself too hard and poop in my arms. I just know it.

But until then I'm not going to stop her. Because seriously? A child that can fart on demand before her 2nd birthday? This kid has "going places" written all over her. Just you wait.