My Dad's Wallet

This is a picture of my dad's wallet.



I took this picture back in October when he moved out here. I had to take it on the sly, but I still think it's a nice photo. It shows just how gay he really is deep deep down. In case you can't see the color, it's purple. And why yes, that IS a shiny brass buckle holding it together.

He, of course, picked this out ALL ON HIS OWN. When given free choice over his decision in colors, he usually chooses pinks, purples, mauves and other similar colors. I'm not kidding.

I don't really have anything else to say about this. I think the picture says it all.

Christmas Day Surprises

HAPPY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!!!

I hope you all are having a very merry day. We got a white Christmas! I've never actually seen a white Christmas. Now I can die, because I know what one looks like.

Last night we went over to my brother's house. His wife found a place that makes awesome tamales They bought like 30 of them and we ate until I wanted to pop. My brother's wife has her whole family in town, and they make the best food.

Anyway, I brought a delicious apple crisp and then we just sat around and ate and talked. But my dad was oddly absent. He was being "Mr. Poopy Pants" (as we call his alter ego that doesn't talk to anyone and sits on the couch pouting for some unknown reason) But we didn't pay him any attention. Everyone else went downstairs to play pool while I passed out on the couch while watching "A Christmas Story"

Anyway, Christmas rocked. Marcelo got me just what I wanted. Here are just a few of my rocking gifts this year:

* New Sheets
* A Bathrobe
* Windshield wipers
* Towels
* Eye Shadow (Thanks Reagan! Are you trying to tell me that I need to wear more makeup?)
* A Squirmy Flying Mythical Creature
* PJ pants
* A Toothbrush

I know some may say that my presents are not very cool, but I promise you that I got JUST what I wanted. Windshield wipers are what ALL the kids are asking for this year. You are crazy if you don't know what a good set of windshield wipers will do for your self confidence.

And now, as an extra Christmas Bonus, I'm gong to tell you some of my pleasant and not so pleasant discoveries about pregnancy. These are things that people told me would happen to me, and I didn't believe them. Here they are in no particular order:

Sensitive Boobs I am one of those rare (and very lucky) creatures that doesn't suffer any cramps or other side effects during my period. When I started taking the pill many years ago, it was the first time that I had ever felt a cramp. How messed up is that? Therefore, I don't get ouchy boobs during my PMS week.

So about 1 week before my birthday, I took off my bra at the end of the night and my poor little girls gave an audible whine in protest as the fell to near my belly button. I was shocked and I actually thought for a while that I had been punched in both my boobs unbeknownst to me. (Maybe my next blog is to discover why I think it's possible to be punched in BOTH boobs without my knowing). It was actually the hurting boobs that gave me the very big hope that I might be pregnant. And they were right!!

But they have not relented. They hurt so much!! I didn't believe that this would happen to me because my friends would say, "oh, your boobs will hurt like when you are PMS-ing". And since I had never felt it before, I thought I might pass this one by (like the vomiting. I KNEW I wouldn't be a vomiter). But as I reach across my desk to grab something, my ladies recoil as I ever so gently brush by them with my arm. It's like they've been saving up for 27 years to hurt all at once RIGHT NOW.

Memory Loss Judd told me about this one. She said that I would be walking somewhere to get something and I would have to stop because I will have forgotten where I was going or what I needed. Now, Judd knows I have a FREAKISHLY good memory. I think she's a little upset with herself for telling me certain items of information because she knows I'll never forget them. She really shouldn't worry, because her stories are all AWESOME.

Anyway, I did NOT believe her when she said this. BUT IT'S TRUE!!! The person who most often receives the brunt of this is Lynn. I will be in the middle of a story or some instructions for her or asking her an important question about a file and I will just STOP because I have no idea what I need and what I was just saying. And it's not like I'm doing something else like reading an email or answering the phone and I can't remember what I need to say. No, it's like full on, looking her in the eye, focused on HER and I just have to stop. Luckily Lynn rockes and she just laughs at me and gives me a minute to gather my thoughts again. I feel the worst about it when I do it TWICE in the middle of the same thought. Now THAT'S bad.

But like I said, I didn't think that this would happen to me, but it did. Just goes to show what I know about being pregnant.

Wanna know something funny? There was a third thing about pregnancy that surprised me, but I forgot it!! (See above item) I didn't write it down, and that's what I get. If I remember, I promise to tell you.

Hope you all are enjoying the holidays as much as I am!!

P.S. Marcelo and I were watching the show "True Life" on MTV and the topic was "I'm Pregnant" and this girl had the baby right on camera. While they did a GREAT job of not showing her whoo-hoo, you did see EVERYTHING else. The baby's head was out, and then the rest of the body came out in a gush of liquid. I turned to marcelo and he was doing one of those "I just vomited in my mouth" quivers. I hit the repeat button on Tivo and made him watch it again to see all the liquid that shoots out at the same time. He was not happy. I just think he should be prepared.

I think it'll be ok, though. I plan on having Judd and Reagan in the delivery room with me, so when he has to go lie down and vomit they can take over helping me breathe and focus.